I popped into the local cheap stuff store to see if I couldn’t score anything weird – it’s my idea of retail therapy. Just as I walked in the Dutch Christmas cards were already within reach and I had to see how bad it was. We don’t celebrate Halloween here in general, so once summer is over, Christmas and Sinterklaas paraphernalia hits the stores as early as September, a common gripe here, as kids no longer want to wait for December to get goodies from their parents.
Seriously, check these cards out. On the right, we have Santa Claus is petting (!) one of the most dangerous animals I know from my native Great White North. This is just beyond tacky, it’s environmentally incorrect and could mess up small children for life (sarcasm in place). It looks cute at first glance, but I jumped when I saw it. Have a good, hard look at what being mauled by a polar bear actually looks like if you dare, I know you want to.
On the left, we have Santa Claus with the entire white fur dangerous wild animal petting zoo: baby polar bear (Knut look alike), a very still rabbit (unreal), two wolves (surreal), a baby seal (mind blowingly improbable) and what I think is a hermine.
Have a white, über-Caucausian, environmentally incorrect yet cuddly messed up Christmas! If anyone wants to receive one of these cards, let me know I have eight left.
